Hurdles and lots of them

Since I decided I needed to start this journey to being healthier I feel I've done quite well by my standards. I'm going to write about a few of the things that are hard for me, times of the day or mental habits so I can look back and see how I've handled them and what I've done differently.

Night time is one of the hardest times for me. I often stay up til 11pm-1am. I really try to keep myself busy up until about 10pm and then sit down to watch some TV and unwind. That is when I want to snack. Normally a bowl of ice cream or some cookies or chips but we all know that is terrible for me in so many ways. Wednesday night the cravings started but I hadn't been to the store to get healthier things to eat, so I kept telling myself no and finally just went to bed so I wouldn't have anything. That right there was HUGE for me and that is how I know I'm doing this for me and not because people are saying I should.

The second hardest time for me  is driving somewhere more than just a jaunt around town. The first thing I do before I start the trip is stop and get a diet soda, a bag of chips and a candy bar. BAD BAD BAD! Sadly though, that has been my routine. Thursday I  had a doctor's appointment in Sayre so I drove right past the convenience store and headed out. I did stop at a convenience store that I knew had healthier things to snack on and got a little package of baby carrots, celery sticks, broccoli and light Ranch dressing and looked for the lowest carb sandwich, a wrap. I was really quite proud of myself. Baby steps. On the way home from my Tupperware meeting that night I thought to myself, "I'm going to pop in and get a candy bar, no one will know" but then I realized I would know. It took quite a bit of willpower but I drove right on by. Then I was coming up on the ice cream stand and said the same thing to myself but once again, I would know. I stepped on the gas and drove really fast past it. To me.... that was AMAZING! My mental state in the past has been that my life sucks and I deserve a treat. I know I still have things to work on with my mind set but it's a start and I really feel like I'm doing it for me, not for anyone else.

Right now this journey isn't about losing weight or inches. It's about eating a healthier lifestyle for my Diabetes, for my long term health. Of course I hope I lose weight and inches but I'm not watching those things, weighing myself or measuring. I'm going by my Glucose meter and what it's telling me. I don't want to try to put too much pressure on myself and get discouraged.

I'll leave you with a little funny, this used to be me!